Breaking up with someone you’re dating sucks, even when you’re the one doing the dumping. There’s no right way to break up with someone. You’ve invested time and energy and sometimes money into the dating relationship, so when it’s time to break up, it hurts. While there’s no right way to break up with someone, there are wrong ways. The person you’ve been dating deserves respect, even at the end of the relationship. So here’s a look at some ways to not do it.
One of the worst ways to break up with someone you’ve been dating is online. MySpace, Facebook, Yearbook, Xanga or a personal blog are public locations. Even if you’ve marked the message as private, there’s nothing worse than opening a message from your boyfriend or girlfriend and learning you’ve been dumped. If you have to do it remotely, pick up the phone. The person you’ve been dating deserves some respect, and doing it like this will only make you look bad.
Dating relationship should neither start nor end via text message. The end.
You know the episode of “Sex and the City” where Carrie is dumped on a post-it note? It’s almost as bad as the text message, but at least in a note it’s hand-written. It doesn’t matter if it’s a long note explaining everything or a short one, “I just can’t. I’m sorry.” Don’t do it. This includes email. Don’t send the person you’re dating an email explaining why it won’t work. Some people might not get it right away and it’s cowardly. Have the guts to say it in person.
Through a Friend
This goes two ways. One, don’t try to get a friend to break up with the person you’ve been dating for you. Two, if you’re friends with both parties, don’t be the messenger, it could cost you at least one friend. This is the coward’s way out. Women tend to be really bad about this, though men do it, too. Do it yourself, don’t let someone else be the bearer or bad news on your behalf.
Ah, yes, the phone call. Though this is the best of the worst, it’s still not an acceptable way to end a dating relationship a better option is available. Even if you’re dating long-distance, you can still use webcam while you’re on the phone. The person you’re dating deserves reasons an explanation, particularly if caught unawares.
The best way to end a relationship will always be in person. That doesn’t mean it will be easy. Dating is hard and ending the relationship is no easier. But the person you’re with deserves the respect of you, as yourself, telling him or her in person. Be straightforward, direct, don’t beat around the bush and don’t ask if you can still be friends. Find a location that’s suitable and if you have a reason, state it without hurting the other person’s feelings. Remember, you cared about this person and you probably still do, to a certain extent. They deserve any respect you can give.